The Only Person Keeping You Unhappy Is You.

Now I know exactly what you’re thinking when you read that, “I can’t control some of the bad things that happen to me.” While that may be the case, life is full of unexpected twist and turns that make things alittle more complicated. 

It’s our choice to dwell on the situation or simply move on from it. 

This is something I’ve been thinking on for the past couple of days, it’s hard to not think about it when I seem to be surrounded by not-so-happy people. I’m most definitely guilty of being one of these people from time to time. I have gotten in the way of my own happiness too many times to even count. 

Recently I’ve had a couple of my girl-friends come to me for relationship advice about how to fix things with a guy who acts like that they don’t care. This is one of those times where I give advice that not many people want or are willing to hear. Because to be completely blunt and cut to the chase, if someone acts like they don’t care…well it’s because they don’t. 

I’ve learned this from my own personal experiences and from watching how this plays out with the people around me. If someone wants to talk to you, they will. Please, name a time when you’ve been without your phone or neglected to check it for longer than 12 hours. If you are going to be with out it, you probably take the 30 seconds it takes to text your significant other that you’ll be with-out it. Right? Exactly, so if you have that courtesy for them why accept that they don’t have the same respect to do the same?

The main topic we’re going to look into is someone who is low enough to cheat. Or more so about the person who makes excuses to stay with him/her after they’ve cheated. Lets face it, staying with a cheater never ends well. You will never trust this person again, and chances are every time you two get into a fight you’re going to drag up the time “they accidentally fell in bed with someone who wasn’t you”. You don’t ever fully move on from someone having an affair. It always lingers in the back of your mind.

 2 a.m. creeps around and you’ll be going over everything you could have done better to keep him from cheating. 

The thing is you can do everything absolutely perfect and he will still have a wondering eye looking for the next best thing. That has nothing to do with you. 

Something that does have to do with you is knowing when it’s time to walk away. 

To respect yourself enough to keep what little pride you have and find someone who loves you the way you love them. Yeah, it’ll hurt and you won’t be happy right away. But you will at least have a chance to be happy again, staying with a toxic person is just putting a ball and chain on your ankle to be stuck in misery.

You’re the only one who has the key to your happiness. You’re the only one who can decide when enough is enough. You’re the only one who knows your true worth.

Sure, you’ve heard all about how sorry they are. How it’s never going to happen again. That you’re the only one they want. All this sounds great, and it might even give you temporary happiness. Until it does happen again, because it most certainly will. I’ve seen it. You’ve seen it. We all know that saying “once a cheater always a cheater” 9 times out of 10 is right on the money.

They may get sneakier and find better ways to cover it up, but you’ll always have that doubt and gut-feeling that its still going on. It’s time to face the fact that even though you love them, they’re not the one. A person who loves you won’t do things they know will hurt you. A person who truly loves you will get sick to their stomach even thinking about being with anyone who isn’t you. This is the person you deserve.

Not the douche-bag that takes advantage of how madly in love you are with them and assumes you’re too weak minded to leave.

Staying only proves to them that he was right. Do us both a favor and give them a big F.U. and finally choose yourself. I’ve been the girl who stayed, the girl who forgave them, and the girl who allowed someone to walk all over me. I don’t know about you but those are all titles I didn’t exactly want to carry.

The best thing I’ve ever done for myself was finally figuring out that I was strong enough to stand on my own two feet. My happiness didn’t depend on anyone but myself 

I wasn’t going to be a prisoner of a broken heart. I know it sure as hell isn’t always easy. But at some point you have to stop making excuses to hold onto a relationship that has already died. Accept the fact that things don’t always work out and don’t fall victim to feeling sorry for yourself. Instead of crying about it, use it as a guide of what you don’t want in life.

This is only one example of a situation that makes you unhappy that you have complete control to remove yourself from. There are so many more. It’s not selfish to do what’s best for you. Sometimes it’s the only way to survive. Take all of the bad things that happen to you and always remember that you had the strength to overcome them. Life is too short to be stuck doing things that don’t bring you joy. Get out and find your happiness!

 

Thanks for reading, I hope it’s gave you some clarity. I’d love to know your thoughts, so feel free to comment! Have a lovely day.

 

5 thoughts on “The Only Person Keeping You Unhappy Is You.”

  1. I think you have hit the nail on the head here. Why do we accept behaviour from people that we wouldn’t put up with from ourselves. Well grounded advice. Sorry if a lot of people in the situations you describe above are not ready for it. They will thank you in time.

    Liked by 1 person

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